LUC Elevators Go On Strike: What now?

Early morning met LUC with terrible news. LUC’s elevators were covered in notices claiming that they are on strike all week, causing an uprising by LUC students and faculty alike. The move was the result of long-rising tensions, elevator representatives say.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” said Johanna van Dorp, the elevator strike’s spokesperson. She went on to elaborate how important the cause was. According to her, the elevators have long faced abuse, little to no pay, and 24-hour shifts with no recognition.

“People leave all kinds of things in the elevators,” she explained. “Garbage, fallen fries – once, someone even left a tree in there. Who do you think cleans all of that up?”

When prodded, she continued: “I don’t even want to talk about the vomit or the slimy brown liquid leaking from garbage bags.”

While she may have a point, the move has really been pushing LUC students’ buttons.

“I mean, mid-terms are coming up soon,” a first-year said while taking a breather on the way down the stairs. “We’re tired, we’re rushed, we’re stressed. I have a 1,200-word essay due Friday!”

When asked, our second-year source could only groan and mumble something about QRM and death.

“Elevators? Oh, are they not working?” said a confused third year while drawing a moustache on one of the ‘silence please’ signs in the study area.

Considering the effects the strike is having on the LUC community, it is likely it will end soon. Until then, you can trust LUC News to bring you the most up-to-date information as it comes.

In related news: students who take the stairs feel less able to publicly shame their peers as more are forced to follow their example.

#News #GuestPost #LUC